CONSTANT CONSTITUTION. DOUBLE MESSAGES OF THE Daffodil
This is how it sounds: “I love you! You're cool! You have to change! Go away It's all your fault! ”And so in a circle. The irony is that the…

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LET'S TALK ABOUT IT". ANTI-GUIDELINES FOR SOLVING SEXUAL PROBLEMS
This is the second article from the series "Anti-Guide psychologist Ilya Shabshin." The first article was devoted to marital disputes, the third will deal with problems between parents and adult…

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EMOTIONAL CHANGE. WHY PARTNERS ARE AWAY FROM ANOTHER
You began to notice that your soulmate is increasingly delayed after work or spends a lot of time on social networks. Later you will learn about the person your partner…

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When is it appropriate to apologize? to apologize or express regret?

In what situations is it appropriate to apologize, and in which – to apologize or express regret? Most do not understand the differences and subtleties of these concepts. Consider them in this article.

Apologizing is appropriate when an act is accidental. When something happened unintentionally. Mistaken, misunderstood, acted impulsively, without thinking, out of habit, etc. I want to eliminate the misunderstanding. Apologizing is when you count on understanding. That you will explain everything, and they will understand you, settle the misunderstanding. After all, the reason for everything is chance, error.

Sometimes you need not to apologize, but to express regrets. Then, when apologizing is inappropriate, because he did something quite consciously and exactly what he wanted, but this entailed consequences that he himself had not expected. If an act has been weighed and calculated (or committed systematically), it is impossible to apologize for it. One can only regret the consequences that he hoped to avoid.

After regrets, you can apologize if the degree of remorse is great enough to reconsider your behavior in the bud. But if you are not going to do so, just regrets are enough. Here the question is very important, for what reason to apologize. Apologizing for a random jamb is the norm. Apologize for having a different understanding of the situation? – Fire me! Only express regret.

The same goes for accepting an apology. The smart one fully understands where your action is random and where it is conscious. Therefore, in such cases, an intelligent person can answer: “there is nothing to apologize for.” Why not at all? – Because it was not an accidental act, but a conscious one.

To ask for forgiveness is something other than apologizing or expressing regret. To ask for forgiveness is to ask for mercy to be forgiven. The one who suffered through your fault. To be forgiven or not to be, it is not so important as asking for it. This means a position of humility when you ask for mercy without counting on it. And just give yourself into the hands of another, giving him the will to forgive you or not.

Naturally, asking for forgiveness from the enemy is to condemn yourself to humiliation, pain and revenge. Usually they ask for forgiveness from very close ones, or from someone who is very offended. But not for those who are hostile to you. Although Christianity extends beyond these limits, offering to love even his enemy. But then it’s better to ask God for forgiveness. Because, by and large, forgiveness cannot be granted by man, because the point is not in forgiveness, but in repentance. This is an inner mental process. And for the one who forgives – too. Therefore, you can ask for forgiveness, expect it – no. Because it cannot be received, it can only be given.

THE FILM “WHAT HIDES A FALSE” LOOKS TOGETHER WITH A PSYCHOLOGIST
"What hides the lie." USA, 2000 Director: Robert Zemeckis Cast: Michelle Pfeiffer, Harrison Ford A happy married couple finds themselves in a strange situation. The wife begins to imagine the…

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Do you know how to put up? 28 WAYS TO RESTORE THE WORLD AFTER CONFLICT
No matter how hard we try, disagreements in the relationship are inevitable. Misunderstanding, broken agreements, unmet needs, unhealed wounds and other reasons push us straight to the conflict. Relationship friction…

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LOVE AND LOVE: WHAT DIFFERENCE?
We all strive for love, for bright, deep, saturated feelings. And at the same time we want our feelings not to disappear with time, but only to acquire new qualities.…

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5 SIGNS OF RELATIONS WHICH IT IS TIME TO COMPLETE
Many of us are familiar with the situation when, instead of the expected emotions from a relationship with a person, you get something completely different. Disappointment is a terrible thing…

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